A digital magazine on sexuality, based in the Global South: We are working towards cultivating safe, inclusive, and self-affirming spaces in which all individuals can express themselves without fear, judgement or shame
Years of control and suppression made their presence felt emotionally, mentally, and even physically. I would walk hunched up and was extremely conscious of how I should present myself physically, so as not to displease others. Those were very stressful days.
The idea of a “desirable” body, sewn in my brain from the threads of Instagram reels, weight-loss ads, and the women on this store’s website, stitches the clothes I wear so that they become coloured in every shade of rejection. I wonder if the women I see outside the changing room, admiring themselves in the communal mirrors, seeking validation from their accompanying shoppers, feel the same way as I do inside their cubicle of doom.
When working with clients at the margins, the effort is not just to find out what intersections they are at and what systems alienate or harm them, but also the internal factors that affect them in the process of exclusion and violence.
What does it mean to extend acceptance and support in one of life’s most crucial areas – the workspace? How do we unpack the concept of positive discrimination and affirmative action at the level of the organisation.
My sexuality had to somehow find people and a space to belong, just as my collaborators and friends needed something of that sort. We found this together in part with Matai Society.
You see, you are being pushed and pulled in all directions because people around you, whether family, friends or the larger society, expect you to behave in a particular fashion and stick to existing norms. However, your inner voice is telling you to challenge these norms and follow your own path.
She turns towards me when I speak, and I can feel her eyes thinking over my words, sensitive to any hint of criticism. Her thighs slide against mine, and for a moment we are both distracted by the naked coolness of our bodies. For a moment, we look at each other.
“City-living gave me talons and claws, but now I want to put those away. I want something else. I want softness. I want grass under my feet. I want the fist in my stomach to slowly unclench. I want the garden of my childhood to get lost in play while letting sunlit hours pass over to rosy dusk.”
The artwork with its process video titled ‘Unmaking of a Calendar’ is an attempt to challenge the ableist lens through which we observe accessibility to sexuality.
सामाजिक तौर पर अनेक उपेक्षित समूहों के लोगों को अपनी यौनिकता सिद्ध करने में अलग-अलग कठिनाईओं, क्षोभ, और दुख का सामना करना पड़ता है, लेकिन मेरे लिए तो यौनिकता के बारे में चर्चा कर पाना एक बौद्धिक कार्यकलाप के तौर पर सामने आया, एक ऐसा विषय जिस पर आसानी से रचनात्म्क चर्चा करना संभव था। सामाजिक विशेषाधिकार कुछ ऐसे ही काम करते हैं।
शायद ये मेरा ख़ुद को यह समझाने और भरोसा दिलाने का प्रयास था कि हो न हो, मैं क़्वीयर लोगों के इस समाज का अभिन्न अंग हूँ और अगर मैंने परेड में लगने वाले सभी नारे याद कर लिए, उनकी बोलचाल के शब्द रट लिए, तो अगले साल की परेड मेरे लिए बहुत अलग होगी और मैं इसमें बढ़-चढ़ कर भाग ले पाऊँगी।