The I Column

Redefining Femininity

Surrounded mostly by women while growing up, and even now, my idea of femininity looks like masculinity and femininity combined….

By Sweta
December 15, 2020
Redefining Femininity
Tomboy Femininity
A photograph of the author, Di Sands

When I finally came out to myself at age 16 and made it to a free queer youth space, I couldn’t wait to be accepted among folks who didn’t play by society’s heterosexist rules of masculine and feminine as polar opposites.

By Di Sands
December 1, 2020
Tomboy Femininity
A ‘girly’ feminist
Two dandelion flowers in a glass vase on a pink background.

Desiring motherhood meant veering into a more ‘girly’ territory, a notion that I had simultaneously been fighting and trying to embrace since childhood. I had understood that to be a feminist I had to be independent, be wary of men, dislike families and relationships.

By Anubha Sarkar
December 1, 2020
A ‘girly’ feminist
How much support is enough?
A photograph of two individual’s hands, from their forearms. One of the individuals is clasping the others’ hand in theirs.

In the middle of this pandemic, can one seek sexual support in the form of a hook up with one’s best friend, ‘just because’? Is it redefining boundaries, is it sympathy sex, is it simple indulgence, or is it something that one or both might later resent?

By Asmi
November 2, 2020
How much support is enough?
The Last Local To Vashi
A photograph of differently coloured cloths hanging from poles in front of a train station in Mumbai, at night

I gave myself the freedom to choose. And I chose to re-examine my assumptions. Maybe it was possible to ask strange men for directions without being afraid of seeming vulnerable. Maybe I could plan my outfit without bothering about the fact that I would be travelling on public transport.

By Tanvi Khemani
October 5, 2020
The Last Local To Vashi
Do we dare?
An image of a DIY candle jar with a jute ribbon and a chalk tied around it

Exploring sexuality is innovative in itself. What does that mean? Well at the outset, the very fact that we are willing to explore our bodies, their sexual expression, their ability to experience pleasure in so many different ways, and that we go beyond social norms is groundbreaking in itself.

By Asmi
August 3, 2020
Do we dare?
From ‘I wish I knew!’ to ‘Is it right to tell them this?’
A watercolour image of a woman

I wish my elders had told me about more than just bleeding when they talked about menstruation. I wish they…

By Asmi
July 1, 2020
From ‘I wish I knew!’ to ‘Is it right to tell them this?’
An open letter to a former friend

(Tread gently. This article contains material on sexual assault) Dear A, I don’t know why I’m writing this. Maybe it…

By K F
June 15, 2020
An open letter to a former friend
Journey with a transman: A self-reflective note

At present Neel[1] and I live-together, part-time. I write part-time because I stay alternately with him and with my sister…

By Sutanuka Bhattacharya
May 1, 2020
Journey with a transman: A self-reflective note
I Recently Had Sex With A Girl
A watercolour painting depicting many hues

I am a 25-year-old cis woman and I recently had sex with another woman for the first time. It was new, it felt nice, but it just didn’t feel safe.

By Pallavi
April 1, 2020
I Recently Had Sex With A Girl
Windows: My Introduction To Sexuality Through Literature
book cover of 'out' - a book of queer stories

All these works have made me acutely aware of how gender, sexuality, and religion, are so deeply intertwined in the social fabric. Also, how conditioning can significantly influence one’s understanding of literature, or the lack of it.

By Asmi
March 2, 2020
Windows: My Introduction To Sexuality Through Literature
Love, Sexuality and Pleasure
Picture of a rollercoaster

It was so wonderful when I got sexual pleasure from someone I loved, someone I had fun with, someone I trusted, and someone whom I liked as a person!

By Anonymous
February 3, 2020
Love, Sexuality and Pleasure
No One Talked To Me About Sex
Picture of a flower with thorns

We need to disturb the institutionalised infrastructure and skew power dynamics even when it comes to something as complex as pleasure. Being aware of our language and the practices of our sexuality and denuding them of socially imbibed constructions will open up a safe space for discussing the diversity of our sexual behaviour.

By Abdullah Erikat
February 3, 2020
No One Talked To Me About Sex
Pleasure and Sexuality – What Is Beyond?
Handcuffs and heels

Over the years, my understanding of pleasure has changed. However, much of it is thanks to external inputs. It is thanks to people of all gender identities sharing how they feel pleasure in different ways.

By Asmi
February 3, 2020
Pleasure and Sexuality – What Is Beyond?
Travelling Solo In India

I don’t know if travelling has changed my life, but I can definitely say that it has altered my thought process for the better. Especially, solo travelling has given me a lot of courage and determination to do things I had thought I’d be unable to do.

By Japleen Pasricha
January 2, 2020
Travelling Solo In India
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