edamame and passionfruitdrizzle met in 2019. Their mutual admiration, love for play, and taking sensual visuals became the foundation of their friendship, and it is still evolving. What you read and see here comes from the many many conversations they have had over the course of nurturing their friendship and their love for play.

“One of the cutest things about her is that there is a particular temperature of water that she prefers and watching her adjust that temperature, sipping and correcting till she finds that sweet spot, is a treat. Then she will pass me the water bottle and say “haann yeh thik hai…” (Yeeess, this is ok…) I agree. The word thirst suddenly makes more sense!” 
– edamame 

We entered each other’s lives back in 2019 in Gurgaon. And realised how similar we are in a lot of aspects, especially the care we put towards planning a play scene – do we have the right toys, is our body feeling ready, is digestion happening ’cos you know your tummy must feel good for the body to be completely present while you get spanked or tie someone up! 

It was October of 2023. edamame went to meet passionfruitdrizzle in Bombay. 

“She made me realise that we both had never made plans to meet another AFAB and have a sensual getaway.” 
– edamame 

It all started with wanting to christen a strap-on but then it became so much more. So the story goes, passionfruitdrizzle had gotten a strap-on but it had yet to be used. Plans would keep failing, mostly ’cos AMABs be flaky! 

edamame during one phone conversation offered, “Oh, will you let me do the honours?” And the plan was hatched. 

They got a room with an attached bathroom. They joked that that room was witnessing something momentous! Before that they went out on their first official date. Then to a party. 

And they left the party early on a Friday night to play! 

“We played for a long time, laughed, ate good food, had the best time that Bombay can offer – where it feels less charged than Delhi or Gurgaon, cities that make maleness mandatory as a way to feel safe from the same said maleness. Yes the irony is laughable but it’s also exhausting. And to be free of that exhaustion, to be able to be with each other, with the possibility of many different kinds of conversations felt so freeing.” – edamame

There are many bases of friendship and the basis of this one has been pleasure, joy as well as grief. All intertwined to make up for sensuality and sexuality that doesn’t feel all consuming, or a loss of identity that many usual romantic tropes end up feeling. 

As AFABs our journey in what and who and how we desire has taken the path of starting from the conventional. The convention that tells us we need to desire and be palatable to men. Both of us had sneaky suspicions that something was missing and by the time we came into each other’s lives we had figured out many aspects of it.

When the story-sharing started we would giggle and exclaim, “Oh my goodness, I am that way too!” The sheer resonance and feeling of not being the only one was a huge deal. Even in the most wholesome storytelling we get to see in the media, capturing desire always feels a bit flat, a bit feeka. To get to add in our own colours and textures, kinks and corners, brought so many things to life. 

When someone asks one of us about our orientation, about our sexuality, we both first look at the person, the context and answer accordingly. But we always, always know that when it’s the two of us, a label or a word isn’t needed or necessary. We both get each other. And that’s such a relief to not feel judged or need any justification. 

Since the first shoot we had in 2019, taking pictures and the joy of going back to look at them, sharing sensual pictures with one another even if we don’t get to meet as often as we would like, and being that space for excitement and joy for each other has felt like such a big feat. 

The loving and adoring gaze is so powerful, even from far away, when living in an unkind world that tells us what our bodies should look like. The societal gaze of what is acceptable often penetrates even our private spaces; we become our own censure. Again another irony, the censoring is necessary for safety but the pleasure of getting rid of the censure for each other, allowing ourselves to just be is so delicious, like that perfect temperature water quenching our thirst and making us whole. 

This is one such friendship that has helped us grieve about the way that the world is letting us down, as well as keep us hopeful and want to continue living.

Cover image by passionfruitdrizzle