A digital magazine on sexuality, based in the Global South: We are working towards cultivating safe, inclusive, and self-affirming spaces in which all individuals can express themselves without fear, judgement or shame

Sexuality and coupledom

A photograph of colourful weaves of threads.

Interview – Coupledom is a mix of meanings

Coupledom may or may not be for everyone, and does not mean the same thing to everyone. Importantly, coupledom does not hold the same value or position in our lives, even in the lives of the individuals perceived to be parts of a couple structure.
A multi-coloured kite with multiple tails flying against a deep blue sky

What Polyamory is and what it could be

Practicing polyamory comes with the struggle of breaking down value systems and non-acceptance that may lead to ostracism not only from the heterosexual world but also from the queer and trans community. Claiming oneself as queer depends not only on how one identifies, but also, in society’s eyes, on who one’s partner is; being single does not qualify and neither does being polyamorous as the latter is considered ‘non-serious’.
A red and white illustration of a spaghetti dish placed upon a chequered tablecloth. Strands of spaghetti are being slurped by two invisible entities. On the top left is a circle sticker with black background and a gold border. The sticker has the text “TNI CLASSIC” in a red and yellow top-to-bottom gradient colour.

The Loves of Others

Both rejections and affirmations of the couple are skewered on this doubleness: It is the fullest expression of love and proximity available to us, and it bears all the insufficiencies of present social relations. Monogamous romantic commitment, like infallible lifelong attraction to only men or only women, is surely a minority tendency expediently elevated to a general social principle.
An illustration of a person with thick wavy black hair, wearing black sunglasses, knee-length polka dots dress and black boots who is dragging a big red heart-shaped bag/balloon behind them in an upward slope. The background is a solid salmon pink and the slope is a solid mustard colour.

REAL LOVE, BABY: THE CONTRADICTORY PRESSURES OF MODERN LOVE

Both rejections and affirmations of the couple are skewered on this doubleness: It is the fullest expression of love and proximity available to us, and it bears all the insufficiencies of present social relations. Monogamous romantic commitment, like infallible lifelong attraction to only men or only women, is surely a minority tendency expediently elevated to a general social principle.
An abstract image of colourful silhouettes of multiple dancing people with squiggly lines around them

Friendships, or, That in which we decouple coupledom from the economies of marriage

I was not simply stuck within the binaries of “same-sex” or “opposite sex,” assuming that any reference to “same-sex” is in itself already revolutionary. But the call to recognise friendship, is a call to recognise so many forms of community that are made invisible by the emphasis within a liberal or conservative framework on “marriage” as the only path to family making.
An image of a vintage-style round mirror with brown frame and a pink-white dahlia with stem lying on the mirror

Conceptualising Love on the Aromantic Spectrum

I now feel comfortable entertaining the thought that my ease with my selfhood does not necessarily have to be threatened by the possibility of love in coupledom. Indeed, comfort with one’s self can actually evolve into healthier forms of love towards the other(s).
A simple purple flower with a ring peeking out from its bottom is located at the top left corner of the image. The text “The Menu of Love” with a large rectangular border is at the center of the image, and the text “The School of Life” in bold yellow is located at the bottom right corner

Video: Alternatives to a Standard Relationship

Is a monogamous long-term romantic relationship the only kind of relationship available to us? This School of Life video explores alternative modes of relationships through “The Menu of Love” and prods us to rethink the notion of monogamous romantic love and coupledom.
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