{"id":16312,"date":"2019-03-18T09:30:07","date_gmt":"2019-03-18T04:00:07","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.tarshi.net\/inplainspeak?p=16312"},"modified":"2020-09-15T14:57:45","modified_gmt":"2020-09-15T09:27:45","slug":"interview-part-two","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.tarshi.net\/inplainspeak\/interview-part-two\/","title":{"rendered":"Public Interview: Choice and Sexuality \u2013 II"},"content":{"rendered":"

This is Part Two of a \u2018public interview\u2019 that TARSHI conducted last month. This exercise took the form of an online survey with eight questions, and two polls with two questions each, on Facebook and Instagram. Our attempt is to collate people’s thoughts, notions, and experiences surrounding the choices they make, and the choices that are accessible to them, with regards to their sexuality. In Part One<\/a> of this interview we had shared the results of the two polls on Facebook and Instagram, as well as the answers to five Y\/N questions in the survey.<\/p>\n

In Part Two of this piece, we present the responses to three open-ended survey questions. We said that the respondents would remain anonymous, and so it is that what you read is our collation and interpretation of the responses to this public interview.<\/p>\n

The Survey<\/u><\/strong><\/p>\n

182 people responded using the Google Survey form.<\/p>\n

Each of the open-ended survey questions created space for respondents to answer as they pleased. Not all responses to the open-ended questions may be included here due to considerations of the length of this piece, but we present some of what we feel may be the most interesting and significant inputs on or about choice and sexuality.<\/p>\n

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  1. When you hear the words disability, sexuality, and choices in the same sentence, what are your first thoughts?<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    Here is a small sample of the responses we received to this question. Some of the responses received appeared to be offensive, or incomplete, or open to being interpreted in deeply harmful ways. We are not sharing these, but we would like to point out that even while reading and reflecting on these issues, each of us has choices about the approach and attitudes that we adopt. Choice comes with a responsibility towards self and others, even in the direction our thoughts take and the way we choose to articulate our thoughts on a subject.<\/p>\n

    Many respondents said they felt these three factors were connected:<\/strong><\/p>\n

    \u201cThey’re connected.\u201d<\/p>\n

    \u201cThey are correlated.\u201d<\/p>\n

    Some respondents found it difficult to identify or articulate connection:<\/strong><\/p>\n

    \u201cIt is difficult for me to comprehend choice in terms of sexuality for people with disability.\u201d<\/p>\n

    \u201cSeems like a ‘not so practical’ idea in a country like India; here we see disability only in the context of accessibility and employment, that too from a charity point of view.\u201d<\/p>\n

    \u201cNothing.\u201d<\/p>\n

    \u201cOkay. Good for them. Never heard the word disability in the same sentence as those words though.\u201d<\/p>\n

    \u201cI don’t understand the question, but each one can choose what they want irrespective of their sexuality and abilities or “disabilities”.\u201d<\/p>\n

    \u201cIt\u2019s not good to talk about this to the elder ones or who are not aware about these words.\u201d<\/p>\n

    Some identified aspects of connection across disability, sexuality and choices:<\/strong><\/p>\n

    \u201cEquality , Intersectionality\u201d<\/p>\n

    \u201cTriple marginalisation. A queer person with disability is oppressed as it is. Choice is a luxury that they afford at a great price.\u201d<\/p>\n

    \u201cLike how sexuality and disability are looked at independently, but that isn’t the case. Sexuality has to do with the expression of the body, that disability limits. It is essential to discuss both in conjunction.\u201d<\/p>\n

    \u201cThe first thought that comes to my mind is how people who live with disabilities are expected to not have any sexual desires or even if they do, they are not allowed the safe space to express that desire -therefore, they are left with barely any choices to freely express their sexuality in a safe environment.\u201d<\/p>\n

    \u201cToo many assumptions about sexuality of persons with disabilities. Assumptions erring on the side of persons with disabilities being asexual or not capable of being sexual. Violations of their personhood.\u201d<\/p>\n

    \u201cHow all three are interconnected – Having a disability may limit one’s choice(s) to express their sexuality. Their choices may be seen as by-product of their disability and hence may even not be deemed as “normal”.\u201d<\/p>\n

    \u201cFirstly, I disagree with the word disability. I prefer differently able. I believe for the differently abled population, sexuality, expression and choices are limited owing to the current conditions of society. Our society limits their freedom to a great extent. Everybody deserves equal rights and freedom to express their sexuality in a healthy, uninhibited manner; everybody must have provisions to be able to make choices pertaining to their sexuality, sexual behaviour and expression.\u201d<\/p>\n

    \u201cI think about the lack of choice that disabled people face in expressing their sexuality.\u201d<\/p>\n

    Some answers expressed a sense of understanding and chose a positive approach:<\/strong><\/p>\n

    \u201cThat just because they are disabled doesn\u2019t [mean] they don’t have sexuality or awareness, and that I wish they had more choices.\u201d<\/p>\n

    \u201c1. Wonderful! and 2. Why not?\u201d<\/p>\n

    \u201cDisabled people choosing to express their sexuality.\u201d<\/p>\n

    \u201cSex for all :)\u201d<\/p>\n

    \u201cMakes me happy people to talk about it without judgement and it’s something to embrace and figure out how you feel about it.\u201d<\/p>\n

    \u201cThat a disabled person should be able to express their choice in matters of sexuality and also experience it the way they like.\u201d<\/p>\n

    \u201cThe world is a much better place when everyone can embrace their sexuality and be proud of it.\u201d<\/p>\n

    \u201cRights – and something that should be talked [about].\u201d<\/p>\n

    Respondents pointed out many other thought provoking aspects as well:<\/strong><\/p>\n

    \u201cNormal but untold stories.\u201d<\/p>\n

    \u201cLack of freedom in society to accept sexuality and disability.\u201d<\/p>\n

    \u201cWe are so helpless with our sexuality and if we raise our voice against big or senior people at our work place we need to think twice if we will have the same power [as] we had earlier.\u201d<\/p>\n

    \u201cThat sexuality is not a disability.\u201d<\/p>\n

    \u201cUnder represented.\u201d<\/p>\n

    \u201cThe inability of lgbtq being accepted as ‘normal’, rather being looked upon as a disability of some sort.\u201d<\/p>\n

    \u201cLet’s bring more awareness!\u201d<\/p>\n

    \u201cAfter watching Margarita with a Straw I don\u2019t find it amusing anymore, honestly earlier I was skeptical.\u201d<\/p>\n

    \u201cRespect.\u201d<\/p>\n

    \u201cFear.\u201d<\/p>\n

    \u201cExclusion.\u201d<\/p>\n

    \u201cTo listen more carefully and discuss and share and talk and talk and talk.\u201d<\/p>\n

    \u201cIt’s Embarrassing to talk in public.\u201d<\/p>\n

    \u201cCertainly a taboo area and rarely mentioned in the same sentence. There is certainly an ignorance and indifference to aspects of sexuality and sexual feelings and choices of the disabled.\u201d<\/p>\n

    \u201cDisability has nothing to do with sexual choices. They are independent things. Having a different sexual choice, different in the sense different from the majority choice doesn’t make you disabled. It’s normal. It should be accepted as normal.\u201d<\/p>\n

    \u201cThe intersection of sexual choice and disability as a domain of study has been largely unexplored as the main focus remains on providing basic needs (food, shelter, care, infrastructure, etc) to the disabled.\u201d<\/p>\n