Definition:

The act of arousing your partner

digitally, with the use of literary talent

you thought you never had. It is most

certainly a threesome: you, your partner

and Mark Zuckerberg.

Tools:

An eggplant stuffed into a chocolate doughnut

is every chef’s nightmare, but for the lazy sexter

who employs emojis for communication,

it works fine. In case your partner likes baking,

try banana and honey pot, add a pair of cherries.

Beware:

Typos are speed breakers, and

autocorrect has kinky preferences: people

ducking each other. Clit becomes clot,

penis becomes peon, babyyy becomes babbling.

Moans

are inconvenient to spell.

Google translates:

“मैं तुम्हारे होंठ सेंक दूँ”into “I can bake your lips”,

“can we fuck tonight?” into “क्या हम आज रात बकवास कर सकते हैं?”

“तुम्हारी पीठ सहला देता हूँ” into “give you a backpack”.

Most languages are step-daughters

of the internet.

Official Language:

as if there was no passionate sex

here before the East India Company

declared our languages inadequate,

rude, creepy, childish – despite

the fruity curves in their alphabet,

words twirling sounds into images

shells of idiom hosting pearls of

meaning at the sea of metaphor,

and yet every day at midnight

the imperial tyranny of English

wriggles into our colonised beds.

Cover Image: Pixabay